Come a long way.

A year ago today, we sat in an unwelcoming room waiting to hear the news, knowing what was coming but somehow praying that the outcome would be different, that somehow the little heartbeat they hadn't found was really there after all.

This morning, I woke up stiff and sore because there's no way to sleep comfortably right now, and felt the little guy start his morning kickboxing routine.

A year ago, I could never have envisioned that we'd be where we are now.

We've come a long way.


There are a lot of things I want to post about, but we're both studying for the bar exam this month and so they'll mostly have to wait. Sorry in advance for any perceived or real neglect, and I'll see you in August.

It's a . . .

Baby was curled up, face down, just like a potato bug, and we weren't sure we were going to be able to find out the flavor at first. (In fact, we're going to need to get a second ultrasound in a few more weeks since that position meant the technician couldn't get as detailed a view of the heart as she wanted. She said not to worry, because everything she could see looked great and healthy, but they're interested in more detail right now. So we're going to have to go in and see our little one again. Oh, darn. :) How will we ever handle that?)

So we took a little break so I could poke around and see if we could get baby to wake up or shift position a bit. Mostly what I got for my pains was a half-hearted little kick to the bladder ("Leave me alone, Mom! Five more minutes.") But then baby rolled to the side for a moment or two, just long enough to get a little peek at . . .

Technician: And see there? That's between the legs.

Me: (thinking: But that's a . . .)

*pause*

Me: We're having a boy?

Yep, that's right -- it's a boy! This actually came as a pretty big surprise to us, since we've both felt pretty strongly from the beginning, and even before that, that this baby was a girl. We had even had a prompting about what her name was supposed to be. This meant that we hadn't really seriously thought about boys' names this time around.

We're very excited to be getting a little boy (I have three adorable nephews and love them all to bits. Although this does mean that my one little niece is going to be even more outnumbered now). But I am panicking just a bit because I have no idea what we're going to call him. And if we can't come up with a more viable option soon, he may just end up being Axel Danger or Commander Awesome. And while that's a name that, once you're an adult, means nobody will mess with you, EVER, you still have to survive to adulthood with that name.

So, welcome to our family, little guy. We love you more than you can imagine, and we can't wait to meet you. And I promise we'll figure out a better moniker than just "hey, you there, boy" by the time you make your grand appearance.


Baby boy celebrated the big reveal by doing a lengthy Rockettes impression last night, so Shallow Man got to feel a lot of real kicking, which he hasn't really been able to do up till now. So much fun!

The big day; or, A Poll.

So folks, today's the big day. We're getting our ultrasound this afternoon and get to find out what flavor of baby we're having. So place your bets! I'll let you all know when we find out.

Super-quick thought

So I've reached 19 weeks now and am almost at the halfway point and am completely freaked out by this picture here.

Really, do they have to make my baby look quite that, well, claustrophobic?

Honestly.

At any rate, my hopelessly squished baby and I are off to bed. With any luck I can sleep through until next week when baby starts looking much less desperately uncomfortable.

Really, now, illustrators, who thought that was a good plan?

Quick thought: Mother's Day.

This year will be the first time I have been pregnant on Mother's Day. But I still remember all the other years and want to take this moment to say that I am thinking of and praying for all of my friends who are struggling with miscarriage or infertility. For many years I couldn't go to church on Mother's Day because it was too much. I know it's hard, and I know there's not always much you can do about it. But I want to assure you all that you are loved, and wish you a happy (if bittersweet) day just the same. Peace be with you.

Finally.

I've got a lot of blog posts that have been brewing for the last month but haven't been written yet because of finals and projects and sickness and such. And I'm not writing them tonight, either, because I'm reveling in the fact that I don't have anything I have to do right now (WAHOO for graduation!).

But I did want to make an important announcement here:

Today I did not have to take any anti-nausea medication.

Yes.

Second trimester appears to be here and loving life. And I am loving the second trimester so far. Never been this far before, but I think it may be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

Update

They found the heartbeat right off. I mean RIGHT off. (Baby is definitely a show-off.)

If you felt a large gust of near-gale force wind this morning around 9:30, that was us breathing a huge sigh of relief.

Thank you for the prayers! It means a lot.