Dear Santa, revised.

I wrote you a letter a couple of years back. I'd like you to please have one of your elves dig it out from the files and dust it off. Then I'd appreciate it if you could carefully read it through and consider it my letter for this year.

Except it's not for me.

All you have to do is change the names—and with your naughty/nice/asleep/awake omniscience, I know you know who I'm talking about—and you'll have my Christmas wish this year.

You really came through for me with that letter I wrote in 2009. Do you think you could see your way clear to pulling that same kind of miracle out of your magic bag this coming year?

I'll leave you the extra-special cookies. And again, I know you know the kind I'm talking about.

Thank you in advance—it'll be the best Christmas gift ever.

Yours, &c.